Brasserie D'Orval - Trappist Ale

Orval Trappist Ale is brewed by monks for people who are filled with sin. Not that monks are without sin, but it is of a much lower caliber. My sin could kick a monk's sin's ass any day of the week. In any case, I expected a lot more out of this beer. The head and nose leave much to be desired (first impressions are a bitch) but the body is quite good. I guess I was just expecting more from the holiest people on earth. The carbonation is excessive so it needs to breathe for a while before it can be consumed. Other than that, this is an okay Belgian. I would pass on this one and pick up something with bigger balls. It is a good beer, don't get me wrong, but when I shell out the big bucks for Belgian beers I want my socks knocked off. God himself would be disappointed but he is a hard man to please. 3 out of 5. Don't drink it.

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Title: TMOH - Beer Review 33#: Orval

nformation About This Beer:

Brewery: Brasserie dOrval
Beer: Orval
Style: Belgian Ale
Location: Brewed by Brasserie dOrval, in Florenville - Villers-d.-Orval, Belgium.
ABV: 6,2%
Rating: 92/100
Website: http://www.orval.be/

Thank you for watching and enjoy your beer! :)

Title: The Hopry Session # 23 Orval Beer Review

Information About This Beer:

Brewery: Brasserie dOrval
Beer: Orval
Style: Belgian Ale
Location: Villers d.-Orval, Belgium
ABV: 6.9%
Rating: 96/100

www.thehopry.com
www.twitter.com/thehopry

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Vegan Double Chocolate Chip Cookies

So a few of you out there are lame-o vegans and always complain that I don't make enough vegan shit. Well guess what? I am not fucking vegan so why the hell would I go out of my way to make stuff that tastes like crap? The other day I decided to acquiesce to your demands and make some vegan cookies. Why? Because I was conversing with a vegan blogger (Writers Commentary, Epicharis) from across the pond and she said she doesn't eat cookies because she has not found a suitable egg substitute. I took this statement as a challenge to alter her cruel, cruel fate. While we are making fun of vegans, let's not forget our favorite (not really) resident vegan, Trainwreck. Let's begin:

Start by whisking 1tbl ground flaxseed with 3tbl water. This is your egg substitute. Make sure you whisk it until it turns all gelatinous and set it aside. In a large bowl mix 1c flour, 1c oats, 1/3c cocoa powder, 1tsp baking soda, 1tsp baking powder, and 1/4tsp salt. In a larger bowl cream 2 sticks of fake ass butter with 1/2c white sugar and 1/2c brown sugar. Add your "egg" and 2tsp vanilla. Since this is going to taste like shit we might as well mask it with an excessive amount of vanilla. Mix the dry into the wet and add 1c imposter chocolate chips.

This batter was really loose so I just kind of globbed it down on a baking sheet. Bad idea.
So I fucked up on my first run. Many of you don't know this but just about everything I do in the Cooking for Assholes kitchen is my first shot at it. Usually I am so fucking amazing everything turns out perfectly on the first try but not today. So what is my problem? Loose dough. Solution? Stick your dough in the fridge and chill it.
Roll it into tight balls and bake at 350 deg for 7 min. These are still a little flat but much better than before. This is as good as you are going to get for vegan cookies. Believe it or not they actually taste really good. Damn I impress myself sometimes. Eat it.

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Title: Twin Peaks: Cooper, Truman and Cole at the Double R Diner

Title: Vegan Double Down

Simon goes DIY with a home made vegan version of KFC's food porn Double Down.

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Caldera Brewing - IPA in a can!

So I only bought this because I was in the middle of playing a shitty round of golf, but Caldera in a can?!? Caldera brewing is the shit and they make some killer brews but in the last year they have started canning their beer which in my humble opinion is totally fucking stupid. When I was bartending the owner came in trying to argue that the can is actually a better way of preserving beer. While that might be true, and I stress might, you are destined to go the way of screw cap wine. It may be better but the general ignoramous public does not recognize this so you are fucked in terms of sales. So fuck you and your dumbass cans Caldera; Too bad your beer is the shit. 4 out of 5. Drink it on tap and not out of a fucking can.

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Title: Climbing in the Valles Caldera '08

Climbing in the Valles Caldera, August 2008

Title: Ashland Amber Ale Review

A review of Ashland Amber, brewed by Caldera Brewing Company in Ashland, Oregon. A good session type beer that I like to keep around the house consistently because of it's nice balanced flavor. Sorry if it is a little slow and boring, but I figure I will get used to talking to a camera. Cheers!

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It's a Keeper: Turkey-Tortilla Casserole

The recipe for Turkey-Tortilla Casserole by Allen Smith in the May 2008 issue of Every Day with Rachael is perfect if you are just plain lazy. Let's be honest, since Darcy was born, my days are much more full than they used to be so some nights, I'm completely wiped out. This recipe was in the Weekly Menu Planner, which is a great resource for these lazy night meals.

I really liked this recipe despite the fact that it was surprisingly simple. Sometimes, when a recipe is too simple it makes me a little skeptical. How can it be good when I don't have to work hard on it?

Admittedly, this isn't the most healthy recipe. It's got a ton of cheese, chips, and sour cream. You pretty much toss it all together in a bowl and bake it for awhile. Easy peasy. Here's the recipe with my comments in brackets:

SERVES 6
Prep Time: 20 min
Bake Time: 40 min

2 limes, quartered
1 pound turkey breast cutlets
Salt
1 large onion, finely chopped
One 4-ounce can diced jalapeño chiles, liquid reserved
Two 14.5-ounce cans fire-roasted diced tomatoes [These used to be hard to find, but now even Hunt's makes them. If you can't find them, look in the natural foods aisle for the Muir Glen brand.]
One 1-pound bag tortilla chips, lightly crushed
One 14.5-ounce can chicken broth
1 pound Mexican shredded cheese blend (about 4 cups)
1 cup sour cream, at room temperature

1. Preheat a grill pan to medium-high. Squeeze the limes over the turkey cutlets; season with salt. Grill the turkey until just cooked through, 3 to 4 minutes per side. Let cool, then slice into 2-inch-long strips.

2. Preheat the oven to 375°. In a large bowl, combine the onion, the jalapeños with their liquid and the tomatoes. Add the tortilla chips and turkey and toss well. Transfer the mixture to a greased 9-by-12-inch baking dish. Drizzle with the chicken broth and top with the cheese. Bake until the cheese is golden around the edges, about 40 minutes. Serve with the sour cream.

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Brown Butter & Chocolate Oatmeal Bar Recipe

During the Olympics opening ceremony in Vancouver, my family started to question my mental stability. As Canadian poet Shane Koyczan stood on the stage and recited his poem, We Are More, I let the tears stream down my cheeks unimpeded. Okay, I may have openly wept and hiccuped. As he spoke of all of the things that were at the heart of my upbringing and inherent to my national pride, I was reminded of why I love my homeland to the depths of my soul. "We are more than genteel or civilized. We are an idea in the process of being realized. We are young. We are cultures strung together, then woven into a tapestry and the design is what makes us more than the sum total of our history. We are an experiment going right for a change." Well said, Shane.

With images of Vancouver and Whistler being splashed across the television screen daily, my yearning for home increases. What do I do to alleviate some of these feelings? Well - cook, of course. Whenever I visit a Starbucks' store on Vancouver Island, I indulge in an Island Oat Bar. Chewy and sweet, this bar goes down easily when chased by a cafe latté. My version relies on the nuttiness of browned butter, mixed with the richness of melted chocolate, to produce a dessert that is a decadent stand-in. Now, where's that latté?

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F, with the rack in the lower-middle position.

Line a 9- by 13-inch baking pan with a foil sling (see photo in the Reese's Peanut Butter & Chocolate Cheesecake Bars Recipe post). Spray the foil with cooking spray.

In a medium bowl, whisk together 1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour, 2 cups old-fashioned rolled oats, 1/2 teaspoon baking soda, and 1/2 teaspoon salt.


Place 3/4 cup (4 1/2 ounces) semi-sweet chocolate chips in a large bowl.

In a small saucepan, melt 1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter over medium-low heat. Cook the butter, stirring frequently, for an additional 12-15 minutes, or until the butter turns golden brown. Pour the butter over the chocolate chips and whisk until the chocolate is melted and the mixture is smooth. Whisk in 1 cup (packed) dark brown sugar.

Stir in 1 large egg and 2 teaspoons vanilla extract.

In two additions, stir in the oat mixture until just combined.

With damp fingers, gently press the batter into the prepared pan.


Bake until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out with a few moist crumbs attached, 16 to 20 minutes, rotating the pan halfway through baking. Set on a cooling rack.

In a small microwave-proof bowl, combine 2 ounces chopped white chocolate and 1/2 tablespoon shortening. Cook the chocolate in the microwave, on 50% power, until the chocolate is melted, stirring frequently. Drizzle the melted chocolate over the warm bars and let the bars cool in the pan, about 2 hours.


Using the foil sling, lift the bars out of the pan. Cut into 24 bars or 48 small squares. Serve.


Other dessert recipes with brown butter:

Cookin' Canuck's Brown Butter, Pine Nut & Rosemary Cookies Recipe
Smitten Kitchen's Hazelnut Brown Butter Cake
Dessert First's Brown Butter Vanilla Cake with Caramel Buttercream
Cooking Debauchery's Browned Butter Chocolate Chip-Cherry Cookies
Chez Pim's Brown Butter Ice Cream

Brown Butter & Chocolate Oatmeal Bars
Adapted from America's Test Kitchen

1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
2 cups old-fashioned rolled oats
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
3/4 cup (4 1/2 oz.) semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter

1 cup dark brown sugar
1 large egg
2 tsp vanilla extract
2 oz. white chocolate, chopped
1/2 tbsp vegetable shortening

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F, with the rack in the lower-middle position.

Line a 9- by 13-inch baking pan with a foil sling (see photo in the Reese's Peanut Butter & Chocolate Cheesecake Bars Recipe post). Spray the foil with cooking spray.

In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, oats, baking soda, and salt.

Place semi-sweet chocolate chips in a large bowl. In a small saucepan, melt butter over medium-low heat. Cook the butter, stirring frequently, for an additional 12-15 minutes, or until the butter turns golden brown. Pour the butter over the chocolate chips and whisk until the chocolate is melted and the mixture is smooth. Whisk in brown sugar. Stir in egg and vanilla extract. In two additions, stir in the oat mixture until just combined.

With damp fingers, gently press the batter into the prepared pan. Bake until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out with a few moist crumbs attached, 16 to 20 minutes, rotating the pan halfway through baking. Set on a cooling rack.

In a small microwave-proof bowl, combine white chocolate and shortening. Cook the chocolate in the microwave, on 50% power, until the chocolate is melted, stirring frequently. Drizzle the melted chocolate over the warm bars and let the bars cool in the pan, about 2 hours. Using the foil sling, lift the bars out of the pan. Cut into 24 bars or 48 small squares. Serve.

Makes 24 large rectangular bars or 48 small square bars.

Printable recipe

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Title: Recipes Using Cake Mixes: #10 Sweet Potato Cake with Browned Butter Icing

The recipe sent to me by Dianna "artofbrowneyedgirl"
Probably the last in the "cake mixes" series.

1 package yellow cake mix (2 layer size)
1/2 cup chopped pecans
1 tsp ground cinnamon (I used 2 tsp)
1/4 tsp ground nutmeg (1 used 1/2 tsp)
3 eggs
1 can (18oz) vacuum-packed sweet potatoes or 2 medium sweet potatoes, cooked and mashed ( 1 3/4 cups)

Mix all above ingredients in a large bowl, pour into a greased 9"x13" baking dish and bake at 350F 30 minutes or until toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean. Cool completely.

Browned butter icing:
1/3 cup butter
3 cups powdered sugar
1 1/2 tsp vanilla
1-2 tbsp milk

Heat butter in a saucepan over medium heat until just light brown. Watch carefully because butter can brown then burn quickly. Remove saucepan from heat.
Stir in powdered sugar, vanilla and 1 tbsp milk. Stir.
Continue adding small amounts of milk until smooth and spreadable. Immediately spread over cake.

Title: Grilled Tilapia with Browned Butter and Orange Scented Couscous

http://www.lightscameracook.com

Recipe:

COUSCOUS:
2 tablespoons butter
1 cup uncooked couscous
1 (14-ounce) can fat-free, less-sodium chicken broth
1/2 cup coarsely chopped orange sections
2T orange Zest
3 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley
1/4-teaspoon salt

TILAPIA:
1/4-teaspoon salt
1/2-teaspoon coriander seeds
1/2 teaspoon black peppercorns
Dash of ground red pepper
4 (6-ounce) Tilapia fillets

To prepare couscous, melt butter in a large stainless steel skillet over medium-high heat. When the
butter is lightly browned, add couscous; cook 1 minute, stirring constantly. Remove from heat.
Bring broth to a boil in a medium saucepan over high heat. Gradually add broth to couscous mixture in
pan; cover and let stand 5 minutes. Fluff with a fork. Stir in oranges, zest, parsley, and 1/4-teaspoon
salt.

To prepare Tilapia, place 1/4-teaspoon salt, coriander, peppercorns, and red pepper in a spice or coffee grinder, and process until finely ground. Rub spice mixture evenly over fish. Heat a grill pan over medium-high heat. Brush pan with a little olive oil. Arrange fillets in pan; cook 2 minutes. Turn fillets over; cook 2 minutes or until fish flakes easily when tested with a fork or until desired degree of doneness. Serve with couscous.

Wine Suggestion: Sauvignon Blanc or Pinot Grigio

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Fire Death Shrimp

These fire death shrimp are fucking hot as the depths of hell so get ready to go running for the hills crying for mommy. You should only attempt to consume them if you have recently been checked out by a gastroenterologist (stomach doctor, stupid). These shrimp are so fire hot they make everything else you have ever had look like child's play. They are perfect for the boastful individual who thinks they are immune to spicy foods. Make these to fuck them. Let's begin:

Take your shelled and de-veined shrimps and liberally (I hate liberals!) coat them in harissa. "Hey, I am a liberal and I believe America should have big government that eventually turns us into a functional socialist nation." You are everything that is wrong with this country you dumb fucker. First off there would be nothing 'functional' about it and second big government fucking sucks ass. I say back off you fucks and get the hell out of my life. This is America dammit and I should be able to do whatever the fuck I want to.

Get a cast iron skillet real hot like at about a 6 or a 7 and toss those puppies down for about a minute and a half per side. That means flip them dumbass.

And there you have it: fire death shrimp. Serve over rice or some other shit like that. Do whatever you want I don't really give a fuck. Eat it.

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Title: Blood Fire Death plays "Blood Fire Death" live @ Katakombe Karlsruhe

The Opener of the show in Karlsruhe!

Full Setlist:

BLOOD FIRE DEATH (Blood Fire Death)
SEA WOLF (Nordland II)
BORN FOR BURNING (The Return)
WOMAN OF DARK DESIRES (Under the Sign of the black Mark)
SATAN MY MASTER (Jubileum III)
UNDER THE RUNES (Twilight of the Gods)
FATHER TO SON (Hammerheart)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ONE RODE TO ASA BAY (Hammerheart)

The Band:

Messenger - Lead Vocals
Sea Wolf - Guitars, Vocals
Silverhammer - Guitars
Man of Iron - Bass
Raven - Keys, Vocals
Stallion - Drums, Vocals

For more information join us on myspace

http://www.myspace.com/bloodfiredeathtribute

Hails to the North!

Title: Bullet For My Valentine - "Scream Aim Fire" Lyrics

Bullet For My Valentine - Scream Aim Fire Lyrics!
Enjoy!


[Back Up Lyrics Down There]

Kill your enemies,
My brothers dead around me,
Wounds are hurting
Death is creeping for me,
Smoke is blinding
Hearts are pounding
Chaos soon ignites
The call is made
It's one for all
Will I meet my maker

[X3]
Over The Top Over The Top
Right Now It's Killing Time

Over The Top Over The Top
The Only Way Out Is To Die

[X2]
God Has Spoken Through His Conscience
As I scream aim and fire
The death toll grows higher

CHARGE!

Fuck this battlefield,
The bullets tear around me,
Bodies falling,
Voices calling for me,
Limbs are flying,
Men are crying,
Such a hurtful sight,
The call is made,
It's one for all
Take no prisoners

[X3]
Over The Top Over The Top
Right Now It's Killing Time

Over The Top Over The Top
The Only Way Out Is To Die

[X2]
God Has Spoken Through His Conscience
As I scream aim and fire
The death toll grows higher

[X2]
SCREAM!
AIM!
FIRE!

[Solo]

[X3]
Over The Top Over The Top
Right Now It's Killing Time

Over The Top Over The Top
The Only Way Out Is To Die

[X2]
God Has Spoken Through His Conscience
As I scream aim and fire
The death toll grows higher

SCREAM!
AIM!
FIRE!

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farro ristotto

i have a new favorite food: farro risotto. have you tried it yet? farro is one of those foods just now entering our group consciousness, recently becoming a favorite of chefs for it's ease of use and high nutrition content when compared to other grains. it is not new to italians, who have been using it for centuries, though it fell out of favor for a while. it has been available in health food stores for quite some time but is now, happily, gaining wider popularity. you can read more about farro here.

farro risotto, of course, is not really "risotto" but an adaptation. i am here to tell you, it is just as delicious, if not more so. farro has a wonderfully chewy texture that makes a great dish with creamy cheese and delicately crunchy vegetables as delicious counterpoints to all that comforting creaminess and chewiness. high in protein, vitamins and fibre, and completely delicious. farro, you are amazing.

farro risotto with zucchini, snap peas, and leek

2 cups farro

3 cups water

1 large onion, chopped

2 TBSP organic extra virgin olive oil, plus more to saute green vegetables

1 cup snap peas, de-stringed

1 zucchini, quartered lengthwise and sliced

1 leek, sliced and finely chopped

1 quart plus 2 cups organic chicken stock

1/3 cup marscapone cheese

1/4 cup parmegiano reggiano cheese, freshly grated, to serve

salt and pepper to taste

first, soak the farro in three cups of water for 15 minutes. meanwhile, chop the onion, zucchini, and leek and de-string the snap peas.

in a large open saucepan, saute the onion in the olive oil. cook over moderate heat for 4 minutes, until softened. drain the farro and add to the onions. stir and cook for 2 minutes until combined. start to add in the stock, a cup at a time, stirring until it is absorbed. i find with farro, it doesn't absorb much for 15 minutes or so, and then becomes quite "thirsty" for stock, as it does, it becomes quite creamy, then you know you are getting close. taste to test for doneness.

set a medium pan of salted boiling water on the stove. blanch the snap peas for 3 minutes until tender yet still crisp. drain and reserve. discard all but half a cup of the water. add in a tablespoon of olive oil and bring to a boil, add in the zucchini and cook for 4 minutes until softened but still bright green and not at all soggy. drain and reserve. now saute the chopped leek in a little olive oil until tender, 2 -3 minutes.

when the farro becomes creamy and tender, swirl in the 1/2 cup of mascarpone cheese, add the cooked leeks, zucchini, and snap peas. season to taste with salt and pepper and serve with the freshly grated parmigiano.

so creamy and delicious, you won't believe it. kids and adults all asked for seconds at our house.

i first tasted something like this at northern spy, a great little place in the east village, i really recommend for local sustainable deliciousness.

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Title: SangioV/Bonardo and Farro Risotto

Food and wine pairing so good, had to whip out the camera about it for TheHungryAmerican.tumblr.com.

Title: Healthy Cooking: Farro Risotto with Asparagus

Ali Occhialini shows Diet.com users how to prepare a diet friendly side dish or vegetarian meal, Farro Risotto with Asparagus.

*Sponsor: Lose More in Less Time - http://www.diet.com/tracking/hitcnt.php?affid=2728&mode=4

Visit diet.com for thousands of other low calories delicious healthy recipes today!

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Baked Brie & Strawberries

We have spent the last week in the eastern Sierra Mountains in northern California.  It has been a week filled with fresh mountain air and outdoor activities.  We have fished, hiked, rock-climbed, cycled, swam, and relaxed.  Of course, we have been able to enjoy the lively Fourth of July activities that a small town has to offer, almost allowing me to forget that I wasn't in Canada on July 1st to celebrate Canada Day.  Last night was an entertaining fireworks display in the village.  My brother-in-law, who lives here, is a member of the county's Search and Rescue (SAR) team.  This morning, we are heading out to decorate the SAR trucks for the Fourth of July parade.  My kids couldn't be more excited to be riding on the snowmobiles that will be sitting on the SAR float.  I have promised not to elbow any kids out of the way to get to the candy that is being thrown by the float-riders.

As a tribute to our wonderful host, I thought it was time to feature a guest chef.  Who better than my brother-in-law?  Now, he will be the first to admit that he tends to cook rather simply for himself.  However, he appealed to my unwavering devotion to Brie cheese and floored me when he whipped up this appetizer.  By the way, ladies, my brother-in-law is inexplicably single.  Smart, handsome, athletic, generous.  And did I mention that he makes a killer baked Brie?  Need I say more?

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F.

Pop open a can of crescent rolls.  A sheet of thawed puff pastry would work just as well.  Lay the pastry on a baking sheet coated with cooking spray.  Place a wheel of Brie cheese on the pastry.

Pile 1 cup of sliced strawberries on top of the Brie.


Fold the rest of the pastry over top of the strawberries so that the entire wheel of Brie is covered. Pinch together the seams.


Sprinkle 3 tbsp of brown sugar on top of pastry.


Top with 2 tbsp chopped walnuts.


Place the baking sheet into the oven.


Bake for 15-20 minutes, or until the pastry is light golden brown. Transfer the baked brie to a serving dish. Cut into it and let the glorious Brie ooze out (sigh). Serve with crackers.

Let me tell you, everyone else was lucky that I was in a sharing mood.

Other glorious Brie cheese recipes:

Cookin' Canuck's Chocolate & Brie Panini

Cooking with Amy's Brie & Bacon Fettucine

Taste of Home's Leek & Brie Omelet

Baked Brie & Strawberries

1 can crescent rolls or 1 sheet puff pastry, thawed

1 medium-sized wheel of Brie cheese

1 cup sliced strawberries

3 tbsp brown sugar

2 tbsp chopped walnuts

Strawberry to garnish

Crackers

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F.

Pop open a can of crescent rolls or roll out a sheet of puff pastry.  Lay the pastry on a baking sheet coated with cooking spray.  Place a wheel of Brie cheese on the pastry.  Pile the sliced strawberries on top of the Brie.  Fold the rest of the pastry over top of the strawberries so that the entire wheel of Brie is covered. Pinch together the seams.  Sprinkle the brown sugar and chopped walnuts on top of the pastry.

Place the baking sheet into the oven.  Bake for 15-20 minutes, or until the pastry is light golden brown. Transfer the baked Brie to a serving dish. Serve with crackers.

Makes one hefty appetizer.

Printable recipe

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Title: Cooking with Johan - Baked Brie

Johan shows us how to do an easy baked brie for the holidays.

Title: 5 Minute Gourmet - Party Food! Prawns & Baked Brie

In a hurry to get some appies together for your next party? Check out Chef Bowen's Prosciutto Wrapped Prawns and Baked Brie with Blueberry Chutney. For more information on ingredients and preparation visit Chef Bowen's blog at http://5minutegourmet.blogspot.com/

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Trailer Park Pasta Salad IV - Pacific Northwest Edition

I had some smoked salmon leftover from a larger pack and I needed something for dinner. I scrounged my fridge and I realized I could make some Trailer Park Pasta Salad. Hell fucking yeah. Let's begin:

First make a 1lb box of your favorite pasta. I use farfalle because it is the best. Next, dice up half a red pepper, half a green pepper, half a yellow pepper and mince half a jalapeno and a few cloves of garlic. You don't have to use the same pepper combination, stupid. This is just what I had. Saute them for about two minutes. You want to barely soften the peppers but the garlic needs to be fragrant. It is a thin line.

Toss some smoked salmon (not cold smoked, genius), haf a diced red onion, 1/2c sour cream, and 1 1/2c pepper jack cheese. Normally I would use more sour cream and less cheese but I didn't want to find out what would happen if I used all my woman's sour cream. Pour the pepper mixture straight from the pan into the salmon bowl. Mix. Add the pasta gradually. You may not want to use the whole box. Toss until combined.
There you have it. A meal fit for a trailer park riverside potluck hosted by a three legged dog named Lucky. Eat it.

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Title: hilarious trailer park boys scenes

trailer park boys. Very funny fragments, from various episodes.

Title: Trailer Park Boys - The Best of Bubbles

Trailer Park Boys - The Best of Bubbles

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Blackened Catfish with Remoulade and Potato Salad

As you all well know, I usually never link out to recipes since everything I post is not a recipe but my own brain child which I discovered with my unbelievable intellect. Today, however, I must give credit where credit is due and it is a site I have linked out to in the past. Before you get your panties in a bunch, I have had zero contact with the author of this blog and this person has not posted since mid-summer. Nevertheless, I love it as a resource. Now would be an appropriate time to mention the 'search' function on blogger. I get a lot of stupid fucking questions from you idiots that could easily be solved by typing some characters into the box in the upper left hand corner. I would suggest you start trying that before wasting my precious time, dickheads. Also you can find me on CL Food Forum making fun of jackasses like yourself so you can always feel free to ask your idiotic questions there. In any case, I made these recipes almost verbatim (but the Blackened Catfish is still my recipe, dammit!) so here is the remoulade and here is the potato salad. I look forward to continuing to make recipes off this site and I suggest you do the same. Eat it.

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Title: In the Kitchen with Ken: Blackened Catfish

Blackened Catfish

4 catfish fillets

1 tablespoon chili powder

1/2 tablespoon Tony Chachere's Seasoning

1/4 tablespoon sea salt

1 teaspoon black pepper

1/2 tablespoon garlic powder

1/2 tablespoon onion powder

1 tablespoon thyme

1 lemon

Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Mix all of the dry ingredients in a small bowl to create a dry rub. Coat the fillets on each side with the rub and set aside. Add a small amount of oil to a large cast iron skillet and bring the heat up to high. Place a fillet into the center of the pan, topside down, and cook for 2-3 minutes. Flip, and cook for another 2-3 minutes. Coat with a little lemon juice and serve hot.

Title: Blackened Catfish

This is the Cajun favorite made popular by Chef Paul Prudhomme back in the early 1980's. This version is done on the outside griddle atop mesquite coals.

Ingredients:
6 catfish filets
1/2 cup olive oil
2 Tbsp Cajun spice mix
2 tsp Garlic salt
5 lb. Mesquite charcoal

Preparation:
Prepare your grill with about 5 lbs. of charcoal and get them really hot, the coals should be white hot. Place a cast iron griddle flat top or skillet over the coals and allow it to get very hot, about 20 minutes. In the mean time coat the catfish filets with the olive oil then sprinkle the Cajun spice and garlic salt on each side of the catfish. Allow to sit for 15 to 20 minutes while the coals and griddle are getting hot.
Place the catfish with the rounded side down first onto the griddle and allow to cook until the sides start to turn white, about 6-8 minutes, then flip them with a metal spatula and cook another 6-8 minutes until flaky and cooked through. Remove to a serving platter, and serve with rice pilaf and a fresh vegetable.

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Big Ass Sandwiches Food Cart

There are a million and a half food carts in downtown Portland and I never really eat at any of them. I happened to discover Big Ass Sandwiches via Twitter (I know, I am a fucking loser) and I knew immediately I had to check this place out since I am a sucker for anything with "ass" in the name. I didn't even realize it was a food cart until I got there and all I found on SW 3rd and SW Ash was this:
What the fuck? I can't believe they covered up the "ss" in "ass!" I guess there are little kids walking around but still! In any case, the owners were super fucking nice and very cool. I ordered the special of the week: "The Pork Hammer." How can you go wrong with a name like that? It consists of ham, bacon, sausage, coleslaw, and fries. For a full list of sandwiches see their menu.
On my short ride home the emanating odor of delicious pork products filled the car and made me want to pull over and cram the damn thing in my fat face. Even when I got home I started to devour it before I took a picture. To my surprise, and delight, the slaw and fries were on the inside of the sandwich. Hell-fucking-yeah.
Now with a name like "Big Ass Sandwiches," I expected this bad boy to be a little bigger. But you know what? If it was any bigger I wouldn't have been able to finish it. At least not without taking a "Big Ass Shit" first. All-in-all I fucking loved my sandwich and I will definitely be hitting them up for more. Patronize it.

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